Turds in the Punch Bowl (A Story of No Ordinary Friendship) by Ashton Jen

Author:Ashton, Jen [Ashton, Jen]
Language: eng
Format: mobi, epub, azw3
Published: 2011-06-10T18:30:00+00:00

* * * * *

Two weeks later, Joe and I were sitting in Sierra Gold discussing the fact that we hadn’t seen Finger-banging Jane since that fateful night. We had already acquired a new regular waitress who always forgot to take the lemon out of my iced tea. I waved the manager over to complain and inquire.

“Hey guys,” the manager greeted us. He knew us by name too. “How’s it going?”

“We haven’t seen Jane in awhile,” I told him. “Sick leave again?”

“No,” he smiled. “She doesn’t work here anymore.”

“Really?” I acted surprised. “What happened? Did she get arrested again?”

“Not this time,” the manager assured me. He put his hand on my shoulder and looked across the table at Joe. “You see all those little things up there?” he asked, changing the subject as he pointed to the ceiling. We nodded. “Those are cameras. They let me see everything that goes on in here. Jane,” he paused before finishing his sentence, “got caught doing something she shouldn’t have.”

“Stealing?” I jumped at the opportunity to prove my instincts right.

“No,” he nodded. It was clear he was reluctant to say. “Is there anything else I can do for you?” he asked while still standing next to me.

“We’d like a new waitress,” I joked. “This new one isn’t cutting it. We want Jane back.”

The manager shook his head and laughed under his breath. A giant smirk crawled across his face and he squeezed my shoulder hard. “Well then, I suggest you tell your friend here to stop fingering my staff under the bar.”

Joe sunk into his seat, clicked his heels together thrice and wished really hard that he could go home.

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